For several months now we have all lived in bewildering times. We are facing isolation from friends and families. We are watching the world’s and our own personal financial viability wobble before our eyes. And there is the fear of illness and death closer to us now than we had ever imagined, and a possible revision of our world as we have known it.
As I write this, the news coming out of America is of chaos and destruction. It highlights the pain, frustration and anger of people when they feel victimised and unheard. The protests started out because of the continuing division between those with power and privilege and those who feel powerless and oppressed. One more brutal attack on the oppressed was enough to tip the scales. And fear governs the reaction of both sides.
These are bewildering times, so how can we make meaning of such an unprecedented global and personal experience?
Well, it is our world view that will form our response in such times. When we seek a spiritual path and not just respond to an outward material manifestation, we have an awareness that can be more imaginative and go deeper into present and future meanings and responses.
While the outer expression of this world crisis is mostly obvious to everyone, a contemplative inner perception is necessary to see the hidden future potential of this tragic pandemic and even the violence erupting in many countries around the globe. As Jesus ended many parables in the New Testament with the words “he who has ears, let him hear,” the hidden can be embraced only through the inner ear, the heart and the soul. Such is the wisdom in the parable of the “pearl of great price.” ( Matt 13: 16 )
For many this is the wisdom of the True Self; the soul. That dimension in each of us that is authentic; our best self; or as some would say, our higher self. But it is hidden under the layers built within us by our childhood, culture, our own ego and life experiences. Layers of security to protect ourselves as we succeed and fail in life. These defences can be called the false self. While it is not a bad self, it is just not our real self. I have found that my work with the Enneagram has been invaluable in deepening one’s understanding of the journey we are invited to take, allowing more of our true self to play out in our lives.
In my work as a spiritual director, the invitation is to companion the ‘pilgrim’ along the path to discovering the true self. While there are several journeys one can take to encounter the true self, the parabolic image I used in my training was Rembrandt’s painting of “The Return of the Prodigal Son”
The story from the book of Luke, describes a young man who leaves his home to find happiness and pleasure in the world. What he desires at home eludes him, so he looks elsewhere for fulfillment and satisfaction. He convinces his father to give him his share of his inheritance. Using this wealth, he lives an indulgent and riotous life. However, he eventually ends up without money or friends and grovels with pigs and eats their slops. At his lowest point he feels the call to return home, not knowing if he would be welcomed but willing to live as servant if that was required. But to his surprise he is welcomed back into the arms of a loving father and a great feast is given in his honour.
The mythologist Joseph Campbell wrote about the Hero’s Journey. It is here that these separate threads begin to merge. The deep hidden truth of the true self is found by journeying away from home and then the return to home.
It describes a mythic story-line that has been played out in many novels and films but also describes what we as human beings go through in our lives if we are to discover more of our true self.
Campbell’s hero’s journey describes leaving the ordinary world, a place that is familiar and comforting. Then a venture into unknown territory, the “Special World” where various trials and challenges are experienced. Inner and outer transformation occurs with each step of the journey. Eventually the hero returns home triumphantly but is inwardly changed from the person who set out on the adventure.
Both the story of the prodigal son and the hero’s journey are powerful metaphors for the journey we need to take to both make meaning in these baffling times and to glimpse a vision of a new future unlike what we have known in the past.
Those who work along spirituality lines often talk about that sense of coming home to ourselves when we start to ‘wake up’. We recognise that the false self is not our real identity with its defences and insecurities, its needs to be in control or play the victim, or express feelings of inflation or deflation. Coming home is the felt sense of recognising our true self, our soul. It feels authentic and real and we relax into it. There is nothing to prove, nothing to force, nothing to change. Just a sense of belonging, presence and feeling at home with ourselves.
To start living more from our true self means we get into a flow of life that unfolds for us. And yet this can also surprise us. Synchronicity brings unexpected situations and people into our lives; opportunities arise that we may not have sought. Nevertheless, we find they are just right for us. Life takes on more meaning as we let go of the striving. Which we once thought so necessary. There are good reasons to come home to ourselves when we have wrestled with the false self. The truth is there is nowhere else to go. It is the place of welcome. Home coming means we return to the place in ourselves that feels true and authentic which is who we were born to be. Without this inner journey, we project our shadow, the part of ourselves that we are not able to consciously recognise. It stems from childhood wounds that happen for all of us but when not recognised and worked with, become destructive patterns. I think we see a collective shadow playing out in America today.
Because of the Coronavirus in today’s world 2020, we have been required to stay home. Even though the shut- down is easing, there is still the request to stay home where possible. So how do these stories relate to where we find ourselves today? Many of us have felt frustrated and trapped staying at home physically, yet we know it will save lives. Finding home within ourselves can be just as challenging yet eventually life giving.
So could we view this time as an invitation to do our own hero’s journey without leaving our home?
And how do we go about coming home to ourselves?
My work with the Enneagram has been a gateway for my own adventure and for the hundreds of people I have worked with.
As it integrates psychology and spirituality, the Enneagram gives insight into what drives our behaviour. It helps point the way by showing us how we get trapped in the false self, with its repetitive thought patterns and unconscious triggers…our shadow. Yet the gift of the Enneagram also shows us our particular ‘virtue’ associated with our type and what our True self can be. When we discover it, we feel like we are coming home to ourselves
If you are feeling the call to come home to yourself, to find meaning in a world of chaos, to shape the world by shaping yourself, my life’s work has been accompanying people on this journey. I have spaces available for those feeling the invitation!
